…since my last shift at the store. And honestly? I cannot see how I survived as long as I did working two jobs, trying to train…being exhausted.
I don’t think I even realized HOW tired I was until I was able to get some rest. And able to get back into regular training. I’ve started going to BodyPump on Tuesdays and Thursdays at my gym, and this week for the first time in I can’t even remember how long I was able to fully complete a week of training on my plan – and do so without feeling totally exhausted and drained.
And beyond that, this morning a friend looked at me at church for a moment and when I kind of laughed and said “What?” she said “You just seem…so chilled out.” And I realized I really am. Chilled out. Even with the stress that comes from teaching special ed, I can feel myself chilling. (And my blood pressure shows it too!)
I’ve also seen a change in Mo. Before when I was awake he was like OMGMUSTBETHISCLOSEALLTHETIME (translation OMG! Must be this close all the time!) and four paws had to be on me as much as possible. Now he will walk in and see me and maybe come in, maybe not, and if he does get on the bed, he doesn’t have to be all up on me.
So all around, leaving has been a super good thing for me. Even if I can’t do every single thing I want, I can be with friends, I can go to church, I can take care of my health… I can be a better me.
I’m not going to go into detail about how things were at the store…I don’t want to burn any bridges with the company. I will just say that I know other parts of the company are not that way. I still love the company, and leaving was honestly the only way for me to preserve that.
I’m really loving the me I am without the pressure of the store. I’ll just let a picture from today at Coney Island sum it up…